My daughter and my DNA is in transit. I find DNA very interesting. I'm not sure if he got his DNA packet yet, I haven't heard from him. Hopefully he does it right away and sends it out the same day it's received. It doesn't take but 5 mintues or so.

I have to say these companies that do these paternity testing seems to have a system that works. It's not as expensive as I thought it would be. We are doing the home testing kit.

You don't realize how things that you don't deal with corrodes over. Each layer that you remove reveals another layer. I know eventually the layers will be gone and finally the beauty underneath will finally be revealed. I do believe all things are for a reason. There are no accidents.

I want the best for my daughter and I feel, as she does, that the best thing would be that she would be my first love's daughter. Soon time will tell and whatever the outcome..it all comes back that it's for a reason and that there are no accidents.

When I dropped those DNA swabs at the post office yesterday...I drove up to the box, and held on to the envelope for a couple of extra seconds...before finally letting go...and I heard it land on the pile of other parcels in the box.

I've only spoke to him once on the phone. Two weeks ago today to be exact. Him and I have been conversing via email for over 1 1/2 years. It took us 25 years before those emails would begin..I wondered if I would ever speak to him again. I guess emails are easier than phone conversations. But I prefer the "human element" of a phone...something so serious deserves that I think...no matter how many feelings it brings to the surface...no matter how scarey it all is... it just deserves more. But I guess he is not comfortable with that and I understand that too, or I try to anyway. It's raining tonight...it will help me sleep.